Sunday, March 4, 2007

"My poor, adorable, flimsy character arc: you blink, you miss it, bless its little cotton socks."

King Dork by Frank Portman. Again, bookshelves of doom lead me to this book. I am going to have a spate of young adult novels coming up, and it's all her fault, because she reviews so many that sound good. It's about a teenage boy who is both an outcast and extremely sardonic. He is awesome.

I love this book. I loved this book so much that I almost went out and purchased it when I was halfway through it, because I was sure I wanted to own it. It made me so very, very happy: happier than any book has made me in a long time.

I'm not sure it made my husband quite as happy, since I kept forcing him to listen to me reading excerpts. Allow me to do the same to you. This isn't the best quote for showing the mood of the book, per se, but I thought it was really funny:
Madame J-M frowned at us. We weren't supposed to speak English in Advanced Conversation. So we continued in French:
"What time is it?" I asked.
"It is 11:05," she replied.
"Thank you very much," I said. "What a shame. If it pleases you, what do you call yourself?"
"I am sorry," said Yasmynne Schmick. "I am hungry. The young girls wear a very pretty dress. They eat and play soccer with the mother and the fathers. My name is Yasmynne. I am four years old."
"Ah, yes," I said. "The young people love to buy discs of pop music for dancing and for holiday making." I chose my words carefully. "They ... they ... my God: they drink beverages. It is true. My two friends Jean and Claude go to the cinema yesterday to view films. What a surprise. They eat. They are flowers."
Yasmynne Schmick nodded. "Thank you very much. I am sorry." Her face clouded over. "There is a match between two opposing teams at the stadium. It is true, is that not correct? Therefore, my little friend," she said quietly and with a sad smile, "all the world very much loves the automobile who calls himself a cat."
"You are correct," I said hopelessly. "I am enchanted. Our little green hat is orange on the head of this very interesting horse."
"Would you like to sleep with me this evening?"
"Thank you, Mr. Roboto."
It was kind of fun. That Yasmynne Schmick was all right.
His attitude toward Catcher in the Rye is also sort of great. I've always thought that book was a bit overrated, myself. King Dork, however: such a wonderful book.

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